Queen of Your Own Life by Kathy Kinney and Cindy Ratzlaff

Queen of Your Own Life is an attitude, a way of life and a call to action for grown up women everywhere.

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Queen of Your Own Life

Archive for 2013

Happy New Year’s Eve

Tuesday, December 31st, 2013

New Year's Eve

Stay tuned for 12 inspirational quotes from this amazing community.


We wanted to take a moment to thank you for being a

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part of the Queen of Your Own Life community in 2013 and to say that we’ve been uplifted by you while we tried to inspire you. Your comments, sharing and encouragement have

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meant the world to us and we’re, frankly, a little in awe of your wisdom. We’ve gathered 12 bits of wisdom from this group that we’ll be sharing in our New Year’s Day post tomorrow, so we invite you to visit the Queen of Your Own Life blog on January 1, 2014 to be inspired by your peers. They’re a pretty wise and wonderful group of Queens. Now celebrate the transition to a new year in whatever way pleases you and please receive our thanks.

Wield the Power of the Snort

Tuesday, December 31st, 2013

The Power of the Snort


She wielded humor like a skilled surgeon, dishing out snorts, guffaws or giggles to the angry, hurt or sullen. And her feisty, funny attitude enveloped everyone in a strong, warm embrace.~ Queenisms™

We’re wishing each of you the gift of a good deep belly laugh that shakes you up and leaves you changed. Oh, and pass it on, won’t you?

Special thanks to Chloe Mort for sharing this lovely photo of her grandmother.

Free Yourself from Toxic Drama

Monday, December 30th, 2013

Dump Toxic Drama

There had been friends and family who had caused her a world of anger and hate. She decided it was time to take back her power by using this simple action and phrase, “As I breathe in calm and breathe out anger, I set myself free from other people’s toxic drama.” She was most definitely the Queen of her own life. – Queenisms™

Drama begets drama. But you can leave the theater. If a ranting negative Nellie is without an audience, her drama will have less power over us.

At the risk of mixing metaphors, here’s another way of saying it. We’re not saying that you should abandon your loved ones or walk away from your friends. We’re saying that when we’ve done everything we can to help a drowning person but that person is more invested in causing drama than in grabbing the lifesaver, then it’s important to get in your own lifeboat and row a safe distance away.  You can occasionally sound the horn and let them know that comfort and safety is available if they reach out, but you don’t need to go down in the wake.

Here’s to less drama and more calm seas in 2014.


Dare to Take Umbrage

Sunday, December 29th, 2013

Unbridled notion


She took umbrage with any notion that stood between her and her unbridled craving to express her creative self. – Queenisms™

We love creative Queens and we know creativity takes many forms. How do you express your creative selves?

A Tsunami of Kindness and Comfort

Saturday, December 28th, 2013


Be a tsunami of kindness


She was a tsunami of kindness, creating waves of comfort in her wake. With simple acts of respect and compassion, she changed the landscape of her world for generations.
– Queenisms™

Every action you take and every word you utter has consequences, for yourself and for a wider world. When you put out negative thoughts, words and deeds, you harm both yourself and others. You may not ever see the results of that negative wave, but we guarantee you they’re there.  And, so often, we’re putting that garbage out in the world without being fully aware we’re doing it. It starts with statements like, “that’s stupid,” or worse, “I’m stupid.” And goes on from there.

Here’s the good news, though, The same ripple effect is possible with positive talk and deeds. When you open a door for someone, say thank you and smile, do a little kind deed without being asked, share a compliment or any other positive action, you impact both your own brainwaves and the sensory receptors of others around you. They feel an uptick in attitude and their next words or actions are more upbeat and as the old shampoo commercial used to say “you tell two friends and so on, and so on, and so on.”

Let’s experiment this week with viral positivity. Let’s be an army of resistance to negative actions and thoughts and boldly put positive waves into the world. Who’s with us?

Special thanks to for allowing us to use this great picture of her Nana, Bonnie.

Beware: All Sugared Up

Friday, December 27th, 2013

Beware: All Sugared Up

During the Holiday Season, when she was tired or all sugared up, she would sometimes slip and start to beat herself up for any number of silly reasons. Then she would stop and remind herself that perfection and being a human being were not compatible. She was learning to treat herself gently and with kindness. – Queenisms™


And, it’s not just during the holiday season. Any time of the year we can slip into that negative self-talk and find ourselves being a punching bag for – well, ourselves. The only person who can save us from this damaging cycle is us. At the risk of repeating ourselves, here’s what we do.

Go directly to the closest mirror. Look yourself in the eye. In a stern voice, repeat after us: “Let’s stop this nonsense right now. You are perfect, just the way you are. Everything you want to do or think you should be doing is frosting. And, by the way, every woman you know is doubting herself just a bit and wishing she could do things more perfectly. You are not unique in this. So knock it off. Snap out of it. Enjoy the bits of this day and your own company and remember that when you show up in life happy with yourself, you are doing a service for everyone around you. So if you can’t do this for you, do it for them.”

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Wishing you much peace of mind and the knowledge that you are all right. Love, Queen Kathy and Queen Cindy

Dare to Dance to the Music

Thursday, December 26th, 2013

Hear the Music and Dance


She heard music no one else could hear and dared to dance. – Queenisms™

There is music everywhere and it’s calling you to dance. Will you answer the call?

We’d like to say a special thanks to Donna Radisch for her permission to use this wonderful photo of her Mom, Josephine.

Merry Christmas 2013

Wednesday, December 25th, 2013


Merry Christmas 2013


When she woke up she took a moment to organize her priorities. She decided that today, as with all days, her number one priority would be to give and receive love.  – Queenisms™


To all of our Queens that celebrate Christmas, we wish you the happiest and merriest of days.

Seeing the Awesome in Others

Tuesday, December 24th, 2013

Bit of Awesome


She always saw the little bit of awesome in people, even when they couldn’t see it themselves. And she took the time to point it out to them. – Queenisms™

Spread a little joy. Look harder at everyone you meet. Keep looking until you see something in them that is awesome or at least nice. Then reflect that back to them so they can see themselves through your eyes. Don’t give in to the temptation to reflect the negative back to them. All they’ll see then is anger, hurt, fear or worse. Amplify the good. Calm the bad. Be the lens for a brighter, healthier, happier world, won’t you?

Special thanks to Kirstie Kingston for sharing her photo of her mom, Barbara.

Survivor, Warrior Queens

Monday, December 23rd, 2013

Warrior Queen

Life had indeed smacked her around a bit but she didn’t need to wallow in it anymore. She made the choice to stop being and feeling like a victim and to call herself what she was, a brave survivor. So sayeth the warrior Queen. – Queenisms™

Everyone has been “smacked around” by life at one time or another. Disappointment, missed opportunities or worse are part of the grand journey of life. Most of us have survived something we did not think we could. We’d like to encourage you to do more than survive. We want to challenge you to thrive. You have the ability to be joyful and to bring joy to others. So shake off the dust from that stumble, get up and walk forward. Turn to the left and notice the beautiful view. Turn to the right and marvel at the woods. Stand still and listen to the birds. Do

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whatever it takes to reframe your day, or life, and leap. Leap into joy. It’s there – waiting for you to grab it.