Queen of Your Own Life by Kathy Kinney and Cindy Ratzlaff

Queen of Your Own Life is an attitude, a way of life and a call to action for grown up women everywhere.

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Queen of Your Own Life

Clutter-Free | Naming and Claiming Our Royalty

We’re cleaning our mental closets in preparation for the holidays and so we can begin the new year fresh, hopeful and motivated to embrace more joy in our lives.  If you’re like us and have your mental closets stacked with outdated ideas, preconceived notions and old myths about yourself, we invite you to join us in a decluttering exercise.

Make a List

First let’s make a list of thoughts, things, situations or even people that just plain make us feel bad, overwhelmed, stressed, or depressed.  Number your list.

Assign a Word

Next, let’s put a word or phrase next to each number.  Make the word or phrase a description of how or why you don’t feel joyful when you think about this.


Highlight in yellow any numbers that you could comfortably eliminate from your lives.  For example, Queen Cindy feels drepressed the day after eating a lot of sugar.  So eating sugary desserts is on her list of potential things to declutter from her mental closet.

Know the Difference

With a blue marker, highlight those items that you are unwilling or cannot, for whatever reason, change.  For example, you may be facing pain from an illness, or you may have family members that are less than supportive.  You may not, at this moment be able to change those things and we’ll talk at another time about ways in which you can rethink those relationships or struggles, but for today let’s focus on what we can change.


Pick one thing highlighted in yellow and repeat after us.  “I will banish item #3 (or whichever number you choose) from my life.  I will not let this stress point live “rent free” in my head.  I reserve my thoughts, feelings, actions and energy for people, places and things that support, nurture and enhance my joy and happiness.  So sayeth the Queen.”

If you’re comfortable, we’d love to have you share one or two things from your lists. When we share our stories, we share our strength. Thank you, Queens.

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2 Responses to “Clutter-Free | Naming and Claiming Our Royalty”

  1. meredith says:

    Your Majesties,

    i ended up with a list numbering in the multiple 100s and it was all green. don’t get me wrong, green is my 2nd favorite color. but i’m not sure i followed the directions correctly: comfortably eliminate & cannot change…nope, i got them right. must be me then.

    good thing i’m bound for California without a banjo on my knee (but there will be serious laughter, thanks to the Whose Live gents and some rollicking songs in my heart & coming out at all appropriate times, thanks to iTunes).

    fingers crossed this once-in-a-lifetime trip exceeds all my low-level expectations!


  2. cindy says:

    Queen Meredith, You have a beautiful, courageous spirit and a fabulous sense of humor and we’re grateful to have you as a part of this community. Happy Thanksgiving.

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