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Queen of Your Own Life

Flow | Back to Me Month

by Kathy Kinney

Flow.  Look in the mirror, make eye contact and tell yourself, “Today I will be the kind of woman who allows life to flow through her.  All of the good and positive things will stay with me and the drama and negativity will just flow on out to sea.”

My natural default mode is to pick up negativity and trouble from all around me.  I’m like a sponge that way.  So, I have to work hard everyday to let everybody around me be who they’re going to be so that I can be who I really am.

I can support and give sympathy to family and friends without depleting or damaging myself.  I am a funny, happy woman who has made the decision to enjoy her life.  I let the things that stop me from living my life to the fullest like anger, fear and soap opera emotions flow right through me and out to sea where they whirl around in the Bermuda Triangle and disappear in a fine mist.  I am the Queen of my own life.

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8 Responses to “Flow | Back to Me Month”

  1. Diane says:

    Queens, I have a very serious question for you. What do you do when you are thoroughly consumed by overwhelming self-loathing? Where do you even begin? No matter what I’ve tried to do throughout my life to improve myself, I just revert back to this state of internal hatred and self destruction. I’ve tried reading books, therapy, self talks, and talking with my only friend, but nothing seems to permeate through my impenetrable vortex of anguish. I see no good in myself in any factor. Please Queens, what do I do to start to change this? Nothing else has worked, but I thought you might have some ideas as you both (Queen Kathy, Queen Cindy) have obviously been through and achieved much.

  2. Pam Belding says:

    Perfect timing!! Thanks Queen Kathy!! xoxoxo

  3. cindy says:

    Diane, we’re not therapists and so we can only say what works for us through experience. And, we want to say that sometimes professional help is needed to clear the fog and give a person space to practice liking themselves. That said, here are some things that work for us:
    1. Surround yourself with positive, supportive people and run (don’t walk) from anyone who makes you feel less than excellent.
    2. Practice gratitude. Every morning and every evening, find one positive thing to say about you to you. Some days it might only be “I’m grateful that I have the courage to try again even though I don’t feel it.”
    3. Do not accept this as a permanent condition. Keep searching for what will make you feel better. Keep trying to find that one thing that will help. You are worth the effort.
    4. Change a habit. There is almost always something that is contributing to a person’s anxiety. Food, drugs, alcohol, addiction to drama, inability to set boundaries with others. Keep a journal and try to nail what it is and work harder than you’ve ever worked before to eliminate it.

    But here’s the deal. Talking these things over with someone trained to guide you in a conversation with yourself can be the most positive investment you can make. xxxooo

  4. Karm says:

    For Diane —
    Please know you’re not alone. I’ve been where you are and I understand how scary and overwhelming that place is. Queen Cindy’s advice is dead – on — and there are lots of other Queens out there rooting for you.
    Take baby steps — Everything you need is already within you and You, my fellow Queen, are Divine because you exist.
    The Queen of Karmalot 🙂

  5. cindy says:

    ♥ ♥ ♥

  6. Colleen says:

    Queen Cindy & Queen Kathy!
    I LOVE this. You are so inspiring. Thank you for your words of wisdom.
    Cordially, Queen Colleen

  7. Barbara Neary says:

    Try to have one good laugh a day. Pretty soon you will find it more than one and even more.

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