Queen of Your Own Life by Kathy Kinney and Cindy Ratzlaff

Queen of Your Own Life is an attitude, a way of life and a call to action for grown up women everywhere.

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Queen of Your Own Life

Practice Firm but Gentle Boundaries | Royal Reminders

by Kathy Kinney and Cindy Ratzlaff

“She wasn’t in charge of the whole world, it just felt like it. People had always relied on her because she was a very capable woman.

At first it felt good to take care of others,but soon she felt trapped and lonely in her self appointed role as “Super Woman.” She decided to practice setting gentle but firm boundaries so she didn’t damage others and herself.  At first it felt uncomfortable to take care of herself, but as she got better at it she realized not only was she taking back her power, but also returning power to everyone around her.”  ~ Queenisms™

We’re not going to lie to you. If you haven’t been setting boundaries and the Mongol Horde are  ruling your life, then those first few times you take care of yourself by saying no or setting some rules, people are not happy.  You’re uncomfortable and others are stunned. BUT we promise you that as you practice, people come to respect that your “yes” means yes and your “no” means no and that when you speak, you are honest.

Are you able to easily and regularly set boundaries? Let’s share our successes or struggles to inspire one another.

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2 Responses to “Practice Firm but Gentle Boundaries | Royal Reminders”

  1. Stumped says:

    I for the first time REALLY stuck to my boundries and refused to be trapped into doing something I was not comfortable with. Somehow this is interperreted as me being judgemental, opinionated, and wrong. I am doing something extremely difficult ~ because it’s the right thing not the easy thing to do. I now feel thrown under the bus by family and friends. Why are other people allowed to do what they feel is right without concequences, and yet I feel that I am not allowed to do the same? (sigh)

  2. cindy says:

    Queen, they aren’t allowed to walk all over you. But, it’s up to you to set the boundaries. And as you’ve learned, it is not easy and those close to us often don’t like it when we change the rules. Just because they think you’re judgmental or wrong doesn’t make it true. We always recommend giving family and friends a second chance by saying “I’ve decided to treat myself with more respect and ask that others do the same.” Perhaps they’ll get on board, but either way, stick to your guns and keep speaking about yourself and others in a kind and supportive way. Eventually they’ll see it’s not a passing fad and that you’ve truly decided to set boundaries. Bravo for you.

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