Queen of Your Own Life by Kathy Kinney and Cindy Ratzlaff

Queen of Your Own Life is an attitude, a way of life and a call to action for grown up women everywhere.

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Queen of Your Own Life

Reinvention

 

Kathy Kinney, Cindy Ratzlaff, Prom Night, Improvisation, comedy, Queen of Your Own LifeCindy here. Kathy recently emailed me this photo of the two of us, along with some fellow cast members, from about 1980 when we were performing improvisational comedy in New York City.

I’d like to say we were young and fearless. But the truth is we were just young. Well the whole truth is Kathy was young and fearless on stage. I was filled with fear every single performance. I was sick to my stomach before going on stage but I did it anyway. And some nights I came away feeling high as a kite about a great comedic moment and some nights I wanted to hide behind the curtains until everyone left the theater. I had so many self-doubts and was so filled with self-judgment that I was in my own way, unable to fully let myself shine. Some of that shiny, funny me came through anyway and people who came to our performances gave me lots of positive feedback. But all I could focus on was my weight, my fear, my shortcomings. Kathy went on to star in The Drew Carey Show, The Newhart Show and many movies. I continued to audition, perform and struggle with fear.

One day, on a temp job, I realized I loved being in that environment. I was getting the applause and praise I craved for doing something different than performing. I was offered a full time job, from that temp job and the book publishing industry is where I finally found a place I could shine. I liked creating center stage moments for authors and not myself. When I did that, the fear dropped away and I was finally where I was meant to be. Just as Kathy was where she meant to be. I cherish these memories of performing and I’m glad I did it. But I’m also glad I gave myself permission to try something new and came to realize that sometimes discomfort is a sign you’ve not quite found your place yet. When I did, it was and is, amazing. Have you reinventedĀ  yourself, given yourself permission to make a change or let go of a dream that didn’t give you joy?

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