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Queen of Your Own Life

Swim | Queen of Your Own Life

by Cindy Ratzlaff

Suddenly she realized no one was judging her as much as she was judging herself. So she decided to stop, and enjoy the swim. ~ Queenisms™

We are our own harshest critics. We judge ourselves with a mean spirit as opposed to a generous one. We speak to ourselves in a way we would never allow a stranger to speak to us. We must stop and adjust the inner conversation.

Look around the next time you’re on the beach. Most people are so worried about the way they look that they’re not fully enjoying themselves in the sun and surf. Bathing suit season is a time of the year when we most clearly feel vulnerable. Trust us. Very few people love their bodies. But can you imagine how sad it would be if we were cookie cutter versions of one another?  We’re beautiful not in spite of our perceived imperfections but because of them. The wrinkles around our eyes from laughing, the grey in our hair because of a life well lived, the folds of skin from indulging in the goodness of life. . .everyone has something.  Image what it would be like to drop self judgment and simply enjoy the swim, either at the beach or in our everyday life.

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11 Responses to “Swim | Queen of Your Own Life”

  1. Rosi says:

    I love this! It is so very true for me. I often need to remind myself to be gentler and kinder; to treat myself with loving affection. It is easier said than done, but with practice it becomes more natural. Thanks for all your queenly love and advice.

  2. cindy says:

    And you are not alone, Queen Rosi. So many women, ourselves included, need these reminders to treat ourselves with a gentle hand and that’s why we write them.

  3. Teresa Draper says:

    Found my beach by the lake near my daughter’ home. We suit up and enjoy the sun and jump in the lake when we begin to perspire/sweat! If anyone needs to feel better about themselves by judging my excess weight, I’m thankful that I don’t share their nasty attitude toward anyone else out there on the sand!

  4. Armeta says:

    I find that nearly 100 % of women do not like their bodies and they will not do anything about it. That amazes me. All they do is complain and hide their bodies. Why is that? I have a group of women friends that all are overweight and they gorge on food and then tell me how miserable they are and wish they were thin like me. I just don’t understand this at all.

  5. cindy says:

    Because, Queen Armeta, change is terrifying to many. All you can do is smile, love them for who they are, and find additional friends who are not bogged down in self-deprecation and inaction.

  6. Ann says:

    At the start of the year, I made a choice to eat mindfully, whether it was an orange or a piece of chocolate, or whatever. Plus, if I was going to splurge on a treat, it was going to be the darn finest treat I could afford, and then I was going to make love to it. I’m here to tell you that while I’m not perfect in this resolution, I’m moving much more and taking care of the body I have. I’m pulling up pants without unbuttoning that were too tight in January. My daughter told me she couldn’t remember the last time I wore jeans with a belt. That’s over 16 years. This just makes me want to run with it more and go on to pedicures and regular massages.

    Here’s a radical idea: Let’s take care of and love the bodies we’re in right now, at whatever weight we are. Don’t wait to buy sexy things until you “lose weight”, do it now. I’m a physics teacher, and “weight” is just the gravitational force fastening you to the planet. It doesn’t have a “right” or “wrong”, it’s just a number. Let’s go for the healthiest we can be in whatever body we’re blessed to have in this life.

  7. Bambi Tuckey says:

    This is a fabulous article! My grown daughter and I LOVE to swim. The past 2 years we barely have access to a pool. 🙁

  8. Mary says:

    I have to remember this. Often I find i’m thinking like I’m back in 7th grade and everyone is judging me, my clothes, my shyness. We moved a lot and having to make friends at a new school each year was tough. Now I’m in my mid 50’s and going to college. People my age are rare in my classes and I struggle to not feel intimidated by the youngsters. I need to stop and remember to enjoy the swim.

  9. cindy says:

    Queen Mary, I think there is no one alive who would repeat those painful middle school years 🙂 And younger people are so lucky to have you as a role model that it is never too late to follow your dream. Bravo to you.

  10. Jay says:

    AMEN, sistahs!!!! After years of being the victim of negativity, low self esteem, and ridicule…I am proud to say that I am loving every single inch of me and learning “how to swim!!!!!” I even enjoy “going under” the waves because every day I am learning how to come back up to the surface. 🙂 Life is so good!!!! Grey hair, crows feet, and all!!!! 🙂

  11. current time says:

    Beautifully said, Jay. The moment of bursting up from underneath the water is a powerful metaphor. Here’s to grey hair, crows feet and wisdom that keeps increasing with time.

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