Queen of Your Own Life by Kathy Kinney and Cindy Ratzlaff

Queen of Your Own Life is an attitude, a way of life and a call to action for grown up women everywhere.

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Queen of Your Own Life

Waiting for the Other Shoe to Drop

One day she realized that she was always holding her breath waiting for the other shoe to drop. She didn't want to live in fear of the future any ore - so she decided to take a leap of faith, let go and began to enjoy the now. - Queenisms™

One day she realized that she was always holding her breath waiting for the other shoe to drop. She didn’t want to live in fear of the future any ore – so she decided to take a leap of faith, let go and began to enjoy the now. – Queenisms™

When bad things happen to good people, even strong people can get into a cycle of anticipating or even expecting something bad to happen around every corner. When we do that, we begin to live our lives curled into a protective ball, trying to emotionally shield ourselves from the next blow. Problem is, when we do that, we also shield ourselves from the next moment of joy or the next miracle or the next beautiful encounter. The key is to acknowledge the bad stuff, find a way to nurture our innate resilience and stay open for the beautiful moments. How do we do that? By living our lives fully awake. When someone hurts us intentionally, we learn to trust ourselves and put distance between us and the danger. When stuff happens over which we have no control, like floods and snow, we learn to reach out for help when we need it and to dig ourselves out when we’re able to do so. When the thing we fear is a mixture of control and no control, like illness or injury, we must find that place within us that allows us to tap our wisdom and resolve and do everything we can to become healthy and whole without spending too much time at the bottom of the well wondering “why me?” If you’ve found yourself in this natural space of waiting for that other shoe to drop, and you’ve come out the other side, won’t you consider sharing your story here to encourage others who are on that path now? When we share our stories, we share our strength.

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One Response to “Waiting for the Other Shoe to Drop”

  1. Cindy says:

    About thirteen years ago, I met the most wonderful man – the “Too Good To Be True” type. After a few months, I moved into his house. MOST of the time, things were awesome. And because of this, I overlooked, and ignored, the times when things were really off. I realized that Mr. Perfect was a Little White Liar, a lot of the time. Mostly exaggerations about his accomplishments and experiences, but on occasion the lies were self-serving and disturbing. To make my long story short, I failed to pay attention to he gradual beginnings of abuse. I told myself that he never actually hit me, although he did slam a door shut on my foot once, in a fit of rage. Mainly, though, his “abuse” was keeping me on my toes…waiting for the other shoe to drop. It wasn’t until after I finally got very frightened and left, that I fully understood the effect he had on me. I had literally developed the habit of tip-toeing, treading lightly, trying not to make waves…for fear the other shoe would drop. (I have since learned that he physically abused his own children, broke his ex-wife’s leg during an argument, and came close to spending time in jail after beating the girlfriend – after me – to a near-bloody pulp.) Since that time, I have learned to walk tall and firmly, and I evolve more and more every day. I choose happiness. I now wake up, every day, and give myself permission to be creative and deeply content. I am 60 now, and single, and I do feel like I am the Queen of My Own Life. 🙂

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