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Queen of Your Own Life

Posts Tagged ‘value’

Choose To Not Be Invisible

Saturday, September 17th, 2016

 - Queenisms™

She vowed to get her swagger back.  So she decided, from this moment on, she would not be invisible.  – Queenisms™

There was a time when we felt so battered by life that we just kept our heads down and stuck to the shadows at the edge of the room.  It happens to all of us.  The release for us was when we understood that it was our choice how to show up and meet the world each day.  Every morning we get our swagger back by reminding ourselves that we are valuable, smart, wise and worth it.  The world is a better place with you and us in it.  Don’t you agree?

The Power of Lipstick

Tuesday, August 2nd, 2016

She decided to wear lipstick today so that every time she looked in the mirror the color would make her smile. And, that smile would brighten her face and her bright face and smile would illuminate the world around her. It was a small, inexpensive thing for such a big payoff. - Queenisms™

She decided to wear lipstick today so that every time she looked in the mirror the color would make her smile. And, that smile would brighten her face and her bright face and smile would illuminate the world around her. It was a small, inexpensive thing for such a big payoff. – Queenisms™

We were probably misleading when we titled this post “the power of lipstick,” because we’re really talking about the power of deciding to be happy and to make the world around you a happier place. When we take a simple action like putting on lipstick, we’re signaling to ourselves that we’re ready to face the world, be seen and present ourselves in a positive light. Some of the actions we take are physical, like applying lipstick. Others are mental like deciding we are going to see the good in people, places and things more often than we see the bad. We can also decide that the chain reaction we set off with a smile is far better than the chain reaction we set off with harsh words, quick judgment, angry looks or disinterest in our loved ones feelings.

Today we’re putting on our lipstick, both physically and emotionally, and making a conscious effort to set off a chain reaction of smiles. You?

Joyfully Alone with You

Friday, March 11th, 2016

She decided it was better to enjoy the solitude than to spend time with someone who didn't see how extraordinary she was. - Queenisms™

She decided it was better to enjoy the solitude than to spend time with someone who didn’t see how extraordinary she was. – Queenisms™

When we understand that we are worthy of our own affection and support, we are able to clearly see how spending time with people who do not value us is a waste of our time. When we stand in our own value, we attract others who understand their own value. We may have to walk away from some of those who do not choose to see their own, and our, value in order to make room for more rewarding and meaningful relationships. That is the work – the daily practice – of happiness. That work will reap beautiful rewards. Are you practicing happiness daily?

Mental Pat on the Back – Queenisms

Tuesday, October 8th, 2013

MENTAL PAT ON THE BACKIt’s positive language week here on Queen of Your Own Life. We might be harping on this idea but we feel it so important, we’re like a dog with a bone on this one. Waiting for validation from the outside world to tell us we’re good enough, smart enough, creative enough or whatever enough we need to hear is not necessary and sadly, can steal our happiness. Why postpone joy while we “wait in the hall” for someone to notice what a brilliant, beautiful, bright light we possess? We can flip that switch and shine all by ourselves.

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pat on the back for surviving, thriving and getting to this point in your life and then share the gift of your perfect presence with the world – and with yourself.

Negative Self Talk Be Gone – Queenisms

Monday, October 7th, 2013

Speak to herself in a positive wayIf we had to name just one change people could make that would have instant positive impact in their lives it would be to banish all negative self-talk from our vocabularies. The undermining messages we

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give ourselves, big and small, each day are not just thoughts. They’re weapons. How do we stop the madness? We did it by stopping, each time we catch ourselves, and insisting on rephrasing the statement. So “I’m so clumsy,” became “I will slow down and be more careful.” “I’m so stupid,” became “That’s something I did not know yet. I’m delighted to learn new things.” What can you rephrase to speak in more supportive language to yourself?

Time Out – Queenisms

Sunday, October 6th, 2013

Banish GuiltYou might notice we’ve got a little theme going this week on Queen of Your Own Life. We’re talking about creating a little me time and asking you to carve out moments in your day that are just for you. Most of us have spent a lifetime in service to others; our partners, our children, our parents, our colleagues, our church friends or whatever circle we’ve created for ourselves. That’s a good thing. But not to the exclusion of time for ourselves. Just as water seeks it’s own level, so does energy (highly unscientific personal opinion). We urge you to not fill every moment with doing but to have the courage to allow some moments to be “empty.” In the emptiness, don’t make any attempt to fill it with lists, thoughts, feelings or any agenda. Just let yourself be. This is a powerful 10 minute exercise and when repeated can be a way to recharge your personal battery. Try it. And we’d love to hear about your reactions.

Deer in the Headlights – Queenisms

Saturday, October 5th, 2013

Deer in the headlights We’ve all had that feeling of life

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rushing at us and we’re frozen like a deer in the headlights. We feel our pulse quicken and we’re unable to think. It feels terrible. One strategy that works for us is to push the pause button. Taking a 10 minute break and removing yourself, even just to the bathroom with a locked door, and focusing on your breathing, can break the rushing

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sensation. We make it a practice to give ourselves 10 minutes of calm every day. Some might call it meditation. We simply call it “Me Time.”

You Were A Wonderful Child – Queenisms

Friday, October 4th, 2013

wonderful childYou were a wonderful child, period. Children are perfect and it’s only time and experiences that change our perception of ourselves. There’s a wonderful exercise you can do right now, that will take very little time but can connect you

to the child you were and help you see yourself in a different light. Write yourself a note to younger you from you today. Tell that pure, innocent child that things will turn out all right. Help her see which of her innate traits will serve her well throughout her life. Encourage her. Help her see that her life will matter. Trust us. You won’t regret the time spent on a letter to you.

Permission Granted – Queenisms

Thursday, October 3rd, 2013

PermissionWhat would happen if you gave yourself permission? Permission

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to do what you might ask. What would happen if you gave yourself permission to ask yourself a question and sit quietly until you hear the answer from within. Ask yourself “what can I do to support you?” Ask yourself “what would make you happy?” Ask yourself “if not now, when?” Then wait. You already have the answers. You just needed to ask.

Judgment free – Queenisms

Wednesday, October 2nd, 2013

Tiired of being judgedThe space that other people’s opinions hold in our own heads crowds out the freedom to be ourselves. When we worry about pleasing everyone, we leave ourselves on the side of the road. What would you say or do if no one would judge you?