Queen of Your Own Life by Kathy Kinney and Cindy Ratzlaff

Queen of Your Own Life is an attitude, a way of life and a call to action for grown up women everywhere.

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Queen of Your Own Life

Beauty Marks

April 11th, 2016

She saw every wrinkle and crease on her face not as flaws but for what they really were, beauty marks that were proof of a life well lived. - Queenisms™

She saw every wrinkle and crease on her face not as flaws but for what they really were, beauty marks that were proof of a life well lived. – Queenisms™

Language matters. When we call ourselves old, ugly, crones, or worse, we’re creating a feeling within ourselves of “we are not enough.” That couldn’t be further from the truth. The next time you look in the mirror, speak out loud to yourself. Thank yourself for having earned each and every laugh line and wrinkle on that beautiful face of yours. Put joyful feelings, rather than fearful ones, toward yourself. Give yourself permission to really see the beauty in experience, wisdom and perseverance. That’s what a life well lived looks like – pure beauty.

You: A Do It Yourself Project

April 10th, 2016

She'd always believed happiness was a D.I.Y. project. And today was a good day to create some joy. - Queenisms™

She’d always believed happiness was a D.I.Y. project. And today was a good day to create some joy. – Queenisms™

Let’s face it. We are all Do It Yourself projects and the project is never done. We’re lifelong learners who experience joy, sorrow, friendship, and so much more, every step of the way. We’re not even sure what we want to be when we “grow up” yet. As long as you wake up in the morning, there is always something more and working on yourself – and your dreams – is the best DYI project we can imagine. What are you working on?

Searching for Joy

April 8th, 2016

She had been searching for joy everywhere until she quite suddenly realized it was an inside job. - Queenisms™

She had been searching for joy everywhere until she quite suddenly realized it was an inside job. – Queenisms™

It’s surprising how often we still find ourselves thinking that some “thing” will make us happy. Things can give us pleasure, but they cannot make us happy. Only we can make ourselves happy. We can do that by loving ourselves, celebrating our accomplishments, nurturing our gifts and talents. We can do it by offering ourselves forgiveness when we stumble. We can do it by focusing more on who we are than what is outside of our control. Here’s a secret. You already have everything you need, right now, to create a joyful life for yourself. Look inside.

 

 

 

 

 

Never Let Them Dull Your Shine

April 5th, 2016

She chose to never let anyone dim her light ever again. - Queenisms™

She chose to never let anyone dim her light ever again. – Queenisms™

We all have a light within us that contributes to the positive light in the world. Let that light shine and don’t let anyone tell you to tone it down. Don’t listen to any voices that say “don’t outshine others.” Don’t let anyone give you pause when you’re thinking about sharing your gifts. Sparkle, shine, burn brightly. Dare to be your own magnificent self.

Pearls from the Queens

March 23rd, 2016

She didn't need a crown and ropes of pearls to make her the Queen of her own life. All she had to do was say yes to the positive voice inside that said, "Life is an adventure and you are brave and strong enough to handle it all." - Queenisms™

She didn’t need a crown and ropes of pearls to make her the Queen of her own life. All she had to do was say yes to the positive voice inside that said, “Life is an adventure and you are brave and strong enough to handle it all.” – Queenisms™

Ropes of pearls and fancy garments are nice. But when we drape ourselves in positive thoughts and actions, we’re creating an adventure worthy of a Queen. By the way, that worthy Queen is you, dear friends. Each and every one of you is worthy of a life filled with joy, friendship, happiness and adventures that make your heart beat faster with anticipation. We believe you are strong enough and brave enough to claim that life. Now go. Do it!

Exercise Some Control

March 21st, 2016

The only things in life she had any control over were how she reacted to people, places, things - and her hair color.  - Queenisms™

The only things in life she had any control over were how she reacted to people, places, things – and her hair color.  – Queenisms™

There are many things over which we have no control. The weather and taxes come to mind. We’d like to add that we have no control over the actions of other people. Yet we spend a great deal of energy worrying, trying to control and planning how we might influence others. What could you do if you gave yourself a break from the illusion of control? We can control very little. But we do have some control over how we react to others. We can comfort, agree, disagree, speak up, walk away, listen and say nothing and a host of other reactions. What we must not do, however, is put ourselves in knots trying to manage what cannot be managed. We must save our energy and efforts for things that matter – like creating more joy and laughter in our own lives.

Joyfully Alone with You

March 11th, 2016

She decided it was better to enjoy the solitude than to spend time with someone who didn't see how extraordinary she was. - Queenisms™

She decided it was better to enjoy the solitude than to spend time with someone who didn’t see how extraordinary she was. – Queenisms™

When we understand that we are worthy of our own affection and support, we are able to clearly see how spending time with people who do not value us is a waste of our time. When we stand in our own value, we attract others who understand their own value. We may have to walk away from some of those who do not choose to see their own, and our, value in order to make room for more rewarding and meaningful relationships. That is the work – the daily practice – of happiness. That work will reap beautiful rewards. Are you practicing happiness daily?

Accept the Dare

March 8th, 2016

She dared herself to find out what would make her happy and, she accepted the dare. - Queenisms™

She dared herself to find out what would make her happy and, she accepted the dare. – Queenisms™

We love the notion of you accepting your own dare. And, frankly, that’s just a clever way of saying “accept your own dream or goal or desire.” So how do we do that? We do it by first getting clear about what it is we want. Seems simple, right? Well, when is the last time you asked yourself, “what would make me happy?” We don’t know about you but we almost need to make an appointment with ourselves to have the emotional space to ask that question and give ourselves the gift of time to ponder the answer. Hey, what a great idea. Let’s put ourselves on our own calendar this week and ask ourselves that question. Then let’s dare ourselves to take at least one tiny step toward making that heart’s desire come true. Who’s with us?

Courage and Fear

March 7th, 2016

Even though she was afraid almost every day of her life, she kept her head up and her feet moving forward. That was courage. - Queenisms™

Even though she was afraid almost every day of her life, she kept her head up and her feet moving forward. That was courage. – Queenisms™

It is sad but true that things happen in the world that can leave us afraid, hurt, sad, and in some cases, truly brought to our knees. Every person has a different timetable for reaching out, getting up and moving forward. And, every journey, no matter what it looks like to others, is a portrait in courage. When we wake up filled with fear, but get out of bed, that’s courage. When we do the hard thing even though we’re afraid, that’s courage. When we reach out to love again, even when we’ve been hurt, that’s courage. So today, let’s hug ourselves, notice someone else who’s displaying courage and celebrate the lives that look “normal” to the outside world but are truly courageous.

Amplify the Joy

March 6th, 2016

She would not allow herself to be defined by the struggles in her life. She chose, instead, to amplify those things that gave her great joy — and that list was very long. - Queenisms™

She would not allow herself to be defined by the struggles in her life. She chose, instead, to amplify those things that gave her great joy — and that list was very long. – Queenisms™

Did you ever meet someone who wears their story like a heavy wet blanket? We have to admit that there have been times in our lives where our “story” felt so soggy and heavy we could not shed it. We’d like to suggest that the way to slough off that wet garment is to amplify those things in our lives that truly give us joy. Make a list. Color it brightly. Hang it at eye level in a place you’ll see often during your day. Read it aloud. And add to that list often. Your struggles may not magically go away, but we guarantee you that your ability to see a way forward, to enjoy your life journey more and to be move away from the oppressive feeling of being stuck in your difficult moments will lessen. What’s on your joy list?